. CHAPTER 24 The Way of Perfection Describes - how vocal prayer may be practised with perfection and - how closely allied it is to mental prayer . |
Let us now return to speak
of those souls I have mentioned
who cannot
practise recollection
or
tie down their minds to mental prayer
or
make a meditation.
We must not talk to them
of either of those two things
--they will not hear of them;
as a matter of fact,
there are a great many people
who seem terrified
at the very name
of contemplation or mental prayer.
In case any such person
should come to this house
(for, as I have said,
not all are led by the same path),
I want
to advise you, or, I might even say,
to teach you
(for, as your mother, and
by the office of prioress
which I hold,
I have the right to do so)
how you must practise vocal prayer,
for it is right
that you should understand
what you are saying.
Anyone unable to think of God
may find herself wearied by long prayers,
and so I will not begin to discuss these,
but will speak simply of prayers
which, as Christians, we must perforce recite
-- namely, the Paternoster and
the Ave Maria --
and then no one will be able to say of us
that we are repeating words
without understanding what we are saying.
We may, of course,
consider it enough to say our prayers
as a mere habit,
repeating the words and
thinking that this will suffice.
Whether it suffices or no
I will not now discuss. [93]
Learned men must decide:
they will instruct people
to whom God gives light
to consult them,
and
I will not discuss the position of those
who have not made a profession
like our own.
But what I should like, daughters,
is for us
not to be satisfied with that alone:
when I say the Creed,
it seems to me
right, and indeed obligatory,
that I should understand and know
what it is that I believe; and,
when I repeat the "Our Father",
my love should make me want
to understand
Who this Father of ours is and
Who the Master is
that taught us this prayer.
If you assert that you know
Who He is already,
and so there is no need for you
to think about Him,
you are not right;
there is a great deal of difference
between one master and another,
and it would be very wrong of us
not to think about those
who teach us, even on earth;
if they are holy men and spiritual masters,
and we are good pupils,
it is impossible for us
not to have great love for them, and
indeed to hold them in honour and
often to talk about them.
And when it comes to the Master
Who taught us this prayer, and
Who loves us so much and
is so anxious for us to profit by it,
may God forbid
that we should fail to think of Him often
when we repeat it,
although our own weakness
may prevent us from doing so every time.
Now, in the first place,
you know that His Majesty teaches
that this prayer must be made
when we are alone,
just as He was often alone
when He prayed,
not because this was necessary for Him,
but for our edification.
It has already been said
that it is impossible to speak
to God and
to the world
at the same time;
yet this is just what we are trying to do
when we are saying our prayers and
at the same time
listening to the conversation of others
or
letting our thoughts wander
on any matter that occurs to us,
without making an effort
to control them.
There are occasions
when one cannot help doing this:
times of ill-health
(especially in persons
who suffer from melancholia);
or
times when our heads are tired,
and, however hard we try,
we cannot concentrate;
or
times when, for their own good,
God allows His servants
for days on end
to go through great storms.
And, although they are distressed
and strive to calm themselves,
they are
unable to do so and
incapable of attending
to what they are saying,
however hard they try,
nor can they fix their understanding
on anything:
they seem to be in a frenzy,
so distraught are they.
The very suffering of anyone in this state
will show her
that she is not to blame, and
she must
- not worry,
for that only makes matters worse,
- nor must she weary herself
by trying to put sense into something
--namely, her mind--
which for the moment is without any.
She should pray as best she can:
indeed, she need not pray at all,
but may try to
- rest her spirit
as though she were ill and
- busy herself
with some other virtuous action.
These directions are meant for persons who
- keep careful guard over themselves and
- know that they must not speak
to God and
to the world
at the same time.
What we can do ourselves
is to try to be alone
--and God grant that this may suffice,
as I say,
to make us realize
- in Whose presence we are and
- how the Lord answers our petitions.
Do you suppose
that, because we cannot hear Him,
He is silent?
He speaks clearly to the heart
when we beg Him from our hearts
to do so.
It would be a good idea
for us to imagine [94]
- that He has taught this prayer
to each one of us individually, and
- that He is continually expounding it to us.
The Master is never so far away
that the disciple needs to raise his voice
in order to be heard:
He is always right at his side.
I want you to understand
that, if you are to recite the Paternoster well,
one thing is needful:
you must not leave the side of the Master
Who has taught it you.
You will say at once
that this is meditation, and
that you
are not capable of it, and
do not even wish to practise it,
but are content with vocal prayer.
For there are impatient people
who dislike giving themselves trouble,
and it is troublesome at first
to practise recollection of the mind
when one has not made it a habit.
So, in order not to make themselves
the least bit tired,
they say they
are incapable of anything
but vocal prayer and
do not know how to do
anything further.
You are right to say
that what we have described
is mental prayer;
but I assure you
that I cannot distinguish it
from vocal prayer
faithfully recited with a realization
of Who it is that we are addressing.
Further, we are under the obligation
of trying to pray attentively:
may God grant
that, by using these means,
we may
learn to say the Pater Noster well and
not find ourselves thinking
of something irrelevant.
I have sometimes experienced this myself,
and
the best remedy I have found for it
is to try to fix my mind on the Person
by Whom the words were first spoken.
Have patience, then, and
try to make this necessary practice
into a habit,
for necessary it is,
in my opinion,
for those who would be nuns,
and indeed
for all who would pray
like good Christians.
____________________
. Foot Notes: [93] The word rendered "discuss", both here and below, is a strong one, entrometerse, to intermeddle. [94] More literally: "consider", "reflect". . |
| . End of Chapter 24 The Way of Perfection . |
